True Crime

HIGHLY SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY

Practicing the dark arts? A Sag Harbor car-washing and detailing business was dumping chemicals in a storm drain on Grand Street, according to a 911 caller. Police arrived to find that there was no storm drain on the street.

Okay, performative! At Louse Point in Springs around 6 a.m., a man was preparing a cup of coffee and watching the harbor when someone called to report him as a “suspicious person.” The man told police he likes driving to various locations to see the scenery.

Rogue interior designer on the loose. The caretaker of a West Water Street house in Sag Harbor called to report that someone may have entered the house and moved some items around, though he was unsure if anything was missing.

Ever heard of a treadmill? A woman called police to say she’d seen a man on Fairview Avenue in Montauk “not walking in any particular direction” and stopping to look at houses along the way.

No cell service out in Springs? Navigate by sun! Someone called the police to report a “suspicious” Amazon truck driving aimlessly about in the Ely Brook Road area. It turned out that the driver was lost.

Back to work! A woman taking a nap in her car before a house-cleaning shift was woken up abruptly by officers responding to a “suspicious auto” report. Due to anticipated heavy traffic, she had arrived in East Hampton early to be sure she’d make it to work on time.

Buggin’. A driver called to report that the car behind him could be following him. Police stopped that car on North Main Street in East Hampton and the driver said he was not following anyone, just driving to work.

Mowing form needs improvement. A “suspicious older man” doing yardwork appeared disoriented to an Amagansett caller. The responding officer made contact with the older man, who stated he was just working at the property cutting grass and everything was fine.

Sometimes your past self is the most suspect of all. . . . A Sag Harbor woman reported her Land Rover stolen from the parking lot of East Hampton Airport last Thursday. Police determined that she had, in fact, parked at the Francis S. Gabreski Airport in Westhampton Beach.

GOOD NEIGHBORS

Welcome to the block! In Wainscott, police responding to a “suspicious auto” report found a woman had pulled into her neighbor’s driveway so that she could back into her own parking spot in front of the house she’s renting for the month.

Time to dust off the old Bernie merch and go flag-for-flag. An East Hampton woman got into a verbal dispute with her neighbor over the amount of American flags he put out in front of his residence. Both parties were advised to avoid each other going forward.

PARTY FOULS

Fun date night idea: A $4,000 dispute at Bounce Beach Montauk went down when a patron accused an employee of charging him for two bottles of alcohol he didn’t order, and for drinking from a bottle that he did order. The employee asserted that the patron and his female companion did indeed order and consume the two additional bottles. The patron paid his initial $5,000 bill, but refused to pay for the additional bottles, and no resolution was reached.

March to the beat of your own drum. Color outside the lines. While on patrol at Navy Beach in Montauk, an officer observed a man with a beach bonfire that was partly in its metal container, and partly outside of it.

We’re all just mammals. Public urination is having a moment in Amagansett. In recent weeks, officers have caught solo and group urinators outside La Fondita, Jack’s Stir Brew, and the True Value. The man outside the hardware store adamantly denied urinating in public, despite having been captured on the responding officer’s body cam.

HUNGRY FOR A SCENE

No puppy highchairs? A customer at Anthony’s Pancake House in Montauk called the cops after she and her service dog were refused admittance. It wasn’t because she had the dog, insisted a manager, but because that dog was in a stroller. Both dog and owner were eventually allowed in.

Thief influenced by the “Liver King.” The manager of Mitad del Mundo Express in East Hampton got in touch with police to report that, on a regular Monday at around 1 p.m., someone called in an Uber Eats order for $5,977 worth of meat. The meat left by Uber half an hour later, but the credit card charge was declined.